Wednesday, September 21, 2011


We have all had those moments where something happens that we did not see coming; whether we weren't paying attention or just did not see any "signs". How do you react though when it has to do with your relationship with your significant other?

Generally, two people in a relationship know when things are not going as well as they should, just as they know when all is well. Well what happens when everything seems to be peachy and then BOOM your significant other reveals that they want to take a step back? Do you say okay, whatever makes you happy? That is the ideal "mature" answer and even though you may manage to utter those words, how much do you really mean it? The way we respond to our significant other is contingent upon how emotionally invested we are.

Unfortunately this happened in my relationship recently. Emotions aside, I can't say it's a bad thing, it may be a blessing in disguise.

Long story short: So everything in my eyes are fine and I was pretty sure he felt the same. We would still spend time together every weekend and 1 or 2 days during the week. He told me he had some things he needed to work on with himself. I cringe at the "it's not you, it's me" explanation, but I can appreciate him not leaving me in the dark. He has still been very supportive of me and hasn't gotten out of character so to speak. So that brings me to my current state: confused and numb.

I honestly felt emotionally drained because I have given a lot throughout this relationship. Then I had several WHY? moments and SICK TO MY STOMACH moments. That is when I realized how much I actually loved him. I have been trying to slowly detach myself because it's really just too much for me; that is, however, easier said than done. I have been focusing on myself, work, school, etcetera, but part of me just cannot completely let go. I have never been this way with others I have dated, the break was always quick and easy. I just can't let go . . .


Nubian1 said...

Hang in there girl.....with time you WILL learn to detach and MOVE on!

I have just come out of a relationship about two months ago. As the days pass, i find that i am one lucky lady. Space and time helps to do a post mortem of the relationship and see the past situation without the aid of rose tinted ones. Things have become so clear i get goose bumps when i think how lucky i am that we arent together anymore!!


Enchantress said...

Thank you Nubian1 for that post. I posted this just yesterday and I already feel differently. I realize that I MUST let go. It is the only way to remain the emotionally healthy, joyful person that I am. I cannot let someone define me and I cannot give someone so much power over me. I was very content with myself and my life before the relationship began and I do not want to jeopardize my happiness due to familiarity. Again, thank you.

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